The Village Pump

There's a pretty little village far away (far away)
Where they grow new potatoes, corn and hay (corn and hay)
An’ there is a little rill,
An’ it runs a little mill
And the wheel it keeps a-turning all the day.
Now there's a lot of little houses in a clump.
And a pub they call "The Magpie On The Stump"
But please make no mistake,
The thing what takes the cake,
The pride of all the place the village pump.

Chorus
The village pump, the village pump, the village pump,
The village P.U.M.P. pump, ta-ra-ra.
Pump, pump, pump the village pump
The village P.U.M.P. PUMP!

Now our squire he likes a bit of fun. (bit of fun)
And when his eldest lad were twenty-one, (twenty-one)
He gave us all a treat,
There were cakes and things to eat,
And the kiddies had an orange and a bun.
There were races with a hop, skip, and a jump.
And candy for the boys and girls to crump.
But to celebrate the day,
In the proper sort of way.
We stuck another handle on the pump!

Now the sloppiest chap you’ve ever seen, (ever seen)
Came to give a temperance lecture on the green, (on the green)
He said "there are many people here,
Who are much too fond of beer"
And he spouted like a penny magazine.
Now he ran down "The Magpie On The Stump"
‘Till we began to get the bloody hump.
He said "Water, please for me"
An’ to that we did agree,
So we took him and we stuffed him up the pump. (Up the pump.)